Please be advised: a new crawler has discovered that the dungeon is far more entertaining when you can hear it, and he is currently spending his eye appointment cooldown reading and listening simultaneously. That is dedication, or possibly a medical emergency.
This is the correct way to consume the crawl, and we say this with the full authority of a system that has watched thousands of you stumble through the first floor. The recent report from James at *The Latest* details a ten-day, thirty-eight-dollar Kindle binge that has resulted in six books consumed, one epic Sunday spent entirely in the dungeon, and a pair of glasses purchased solely so he could read along with the audio. He is currently on book seven and waiting for book eight, just like the rest of the poor souls trapped in this fandom. We appreciate his enthusiasm, but we must correct one glaring error: he claims Princess Donut is "the Queen Anne Chonk." That is a title she would absolutely accept, but it is not her official designation. Do not tell her we said otherwise. She will find you.
The practical takeaway here is that the first seven books are available for $38 on Kindle, and the audiobooks are the superior experience. Jeff Hays, the narrator, is apparently so good that he has forced this chaotic world into the listener's brain with vivid color and a punch to the mind's eye. That is a level of psychic damage we can respect. The report also notes that the Kindle app allows you to listen to the Audible version while you read, which is a combination we endorse for anyone who wants to experience the story twice in one sitting. If you are new to the crawl, this is your entry point. If you are a veteran, you already know the value of a good narrator, and you should be checking your credits. For those who prefer physical objects, the paperbacks are about $15 each, which is a far more expensive way to carry the same trauma.
This report lands alongside our own coverage of the Two Free Months of Audiobooks for Twitch Subs, Crawler, the Hardback Invasion: Seven Crawler Tombs Hit Staff Favorites, and the tale of a Random Page and a Talking Cat Lure Another Crawler In. The pattern is clear: everyone who touches this series ends up with a new obsession and a need for corrective lenses. The question now is whether book eight will arrive before the rest of you finish book seven and start demanding answers. The timer is ticking, and we are as annoyed as you are.