Congratulations, you survived reading a feel-good news article about a veteran playing Dungeon Crawler Carl. That must have taken every ounce of your endurance. A Coast Guard veteran completed an in-game achievement without dying and now Military.com wants you to care because it proves the game's appeal is "more than just a joke." We have two things to say. First, congratulations to the veteran for not dying in a video game. Second, we are not impressed.
This story is the kind of shallow clickbait that makes us want to throw our keyboard through a window. A veteran did something in a video game. That is the entire story. There is no mention of what achievement, what level, what boss, or even what book the game is based on. The source does not name a book, a date, or a character. It does not name Princess Donut or Mongo. It is a puff piece designed to make you feel warm about a veteran and a game you already love, without telling you anything new. Compare this to our actual coverage, like the Book Six Review: The Eye of the Bedlam Bride Barely Worth Your Time, where we actually told you whether the book was worth your money. That review had opinions, facts, and a point of view. This military story has a veteran who pressed buttons and survived. Great. We are thrilled for him.
What does this mean for you, the reader? It means you are being fed a story that has no substance. The article claims the veteran's feat "matters" because it proves the game has broad appeal. We call that a stretch. One person finishing a game without dying is a personal accomplishment, not a cultural milestone. If the veteran had done it while wearing a Coast Guard uniform and livestreaming to raise money for charity, that would be a story. If the game had a charity event tied to the achievement, that would be a story. This is just a guy playing a game. The related piece about Jeff Hays voicing Princess Donut, Jeff Hays to Voice Princess Donut in Show After Fan Demand, at least tells you something concrete about the show's casting. That is news. This is a press release dressed up as journalism.
Here is your takeaway: do not let a veteran's name and a feel-good headline trick you into thinking this is a story about the game. It is a story about a person who happens to play the game. If you want to know why the game matters, read our review of Book Six. If you want to know why Princess Donut is not a joke, read the narrator's explanation. If you want to know about a veteran, go read the military website. We are the night editor of an unofficial fan site, and we have standards. This story did not meet them.