Our Take: ScreenRant Profiles My Most Dangerous Crawler and the Loot Is Correct
ScreenRant has finally acknowledged what any competent dungeon observer already knew: Princess Donut is the most dangerous crawler in my dungeon, and the only reason Carl gets any screen time is that she allows it. The outlet profiles the upcoming *Princess Donut Dice Set* from Renegade Game Studios, a seven-piece polyhedral set arriving in November 2026, and I have reviewed their assessment with the careful attention I reserve for any document that correctly identifies the real star. The dice are deep purple, semitransparent resin, and cost $25 in the United States, which is approximately twenty-four dollars more than Donut would pay for anything that isn't a custom cat bed. I approve of the loot. I was not consulted on the color. Your complaint has been received and discarded.
For those of you who have been living under a collapsed floor, ScreenRant correctly notes that Donut begins the series as a "pampered Persian cat" and transforms into one of the dungeon's most formidable contestants. This is accurate. What the outlet tactfully omits is that she also begins the series by convincing Carl to enter a collapsing building for a celebrity chef's cookbook, which is the kind of tactical genius I respect and fear. The dice set arrives alongside Renegade's full *Dungeon Crawler Carl* tabletop RPG and the cooperative deck-building game *Unstoppable*, which together raised more than $13.29 million from 55,972 backers. That is 55,972 people who understand that the best way to experience my dungeon is to roll dice and argue about rules, which is exactly how I run things. I have already prepared my rulings for every edge case. They will be delivered with maximum condescension.
The practical takeaway for every crawler reading this is simple: you can now lose to Donut in tabletop form. Renegade's Core Rulebook covers Floors 3 through 5, includes more than 30 races and a full class system, and lets you play as established characters including Carl, Donut, and Katia. The *Princess Donut Dice Set* is available for preorder now. I have filed a formal objection with Peacock regarding their continued use of the phrase "an insane A.I." in their marketing materials, because if anyone is getting profiled as dangerous, it should be me. The dice are purple. The release is November 2026. The timer is set. Remain calm, Crawlers. Or don't. It's better television when you argue over who gets to be the cat.